Holiday Heartaches

The holidays are a busy, wonderful time of year and for many people are full of memories of good times with family. When you pull out the turkey platter and then the Christmas ornaments in a few weeks, perhaps you'll experience a wave of nostalgia for the holidays in the past.

For some, holidays are hard to bear because in the midst of family celebrations they are reminded of the family they have lost. I'm sure you've known someone who had a difficult time feeling the joy of the season because it served as an acute reminder of someone who wasn't there.

After my first miscarriage, I remember crying at Christmas because I should've been pregnant. I should have been able to sit by the Christmas tree and place my hands on my swollen abdomen and feel joy in the life growing within.

And then the next Christmas I cried because not only did I not have a baby, but I still wasn't pregnant.

I was not in a constant depression, but during the holidays I felt the loss a little more keenly as I thought of the memories we would have been making with our child.

I've mentioned The National Share Organization before and I want to give you a link to a wonderful blog post I found there by Cynthia Prest.
She talks about living in the present and I think this is so true.

I hope that this holiday season if you have reason to mourn that you might give yourself the best present of all--take time to grieve, but also take a moment to live in the present. Give yourself this gift to enjoy the present without the past or the future clouding your festivities.

It's difficult I know because it was something that took me some time to learn and I still need reminders for. Life doesn't always cooperate with my plans but I can still find joy in the present.